Kate's Birthday

Kate with her big brothers and Bruno in Quarry Road garden ~ she was probably four at the time.


Kate is the youngest and 51 today ~ in those Norfolk days I'd read about this new system of childbirth, well ~ HELP in childbirth ~ I think it boiled dow to this : by understanding exactly what was going on, a woman could somehow overcome the pain ~ I must look it up ~ anyway, with the baby due in early January I found a psycho-whatsit-whatsit class in Norwich and got myself there on the train one night ~ as far as I remember, rather than exercises it was a lecture with model womb and birth canal ~ some husbands were there and were instructed on how to help at the birth ~ I think there was a ten week course but this was the only class I got to as by the next week Kate was there in person.  Nevertheless, that brief introduction to this system was a great help ~ she was born within an hour and honestly with practically no pain.  I've not heard of this psychoprophylaxis  (must look up spelling) again since, but then I've not been needing childbirth advice ~ thankfully !!   It was being promoted in a big way by the National Childbirth Trust and the first I'd read about it must have been in the Guardian's "Women's Page".  Later, I had a dozen or more articles published on that page, of which I am quite proud ~ in spite of rejection slips in every post, while The Guardian was taking my work I could persuade myself I was a writer ~ no, that I was capable of becoming one ~ clutching at straws, again.

 Monday 9.40pm : having written a couple of paragraphs WITHOUT IMMEDIATELY SAVING THEM something happened and all disappeared ~ so no more tonight, folks !

Tuesday 9.15pm: Cold today and fierce wind blowing ~ along to PO to send Doug's birthday card (he'll be 15 tomorrow), and replenished cash from Brian's machine.   Having ordered a new set of coloured pens from Amazon, I went through all the old ones and more than half of them are dried out and past it.   Rang Heart Shop who next Tuesday will collect any stuff I leave out on the step ~ must sort things out before then.   I'm about ready to try selling books back to Amazon ~ no p&p involved as they send sticky FREE POSTAGE labels.   Sainsbury's delivery came at lunch time so before hand emptied fridge and sponged it down, and reorganised freezer ~ very useful jobs which I reckon to do each time a delivery is due.  Made bread and butter pudding with remains of fruit loaf well sprinkled with nutmeg, and served with cream and a good splodge of maple syrup.   

the maple syrup  reminds me of Laura Ingalls Wilder's wonderful books for children ~ Little town on the Prairie etc ~ however a review in Saturday's Guardian of her first attempt to write of the Ingalls family trek across the Canadian prairies wasan  altogether darker story with plenty of theft, violence and alcoholism ~ Pioneer Girl the annotaded autobiography, published by South Dakota State Historical Society @ £22.57 ~ having failed to get this version published, she re-wrote the tale again, much sanitised and aimed at children ~ I have to say I was totally hooked on the books myself, never mind the harsh realiety.

 I'm re-reading the hilarious books by Alexander McCall Smith about these three idiot German Professors ~ these three little paperbacks are what introduced us to A McS ~ I gave them to John one Christmas and he laughed himself silly ~ apparently it is true that German academics with more than one PhD for example are actually addressed as Herr Dr Dr Dr Professor Smith, or whatever ~ incredible !!   It's making me feel a little sad, remembering how he would read bits out and we'd both collapse laughing.

Kate is trying to persuade me to at least keep some of those Dodo Pads ~ but on Saturday having flipped through 1977, 78 and 79 (the years around our divorce) I was left feeling really upset ~ poor Howard lost his home and his family, and set off to a new job, a new Headship in Willoughby near Hull ~ but I was the one who'd gone off the rails ~ oh dear !   He was thoroughly honourable about the North View house, paying for it outright although this left him very little to find a place up north.  We left Quarry Road a week before Christmas, and he stayed  with us for the few remaining days till the end of term ~ and then off he went to Hull, on his own, at Christmas, not knowing where he was going to stay . . .  and I'm sure if ou asked him, he'd say in bewilderment he had no idea why our marriage fell apart ~ as far as he was aware we were one big happy family ~ until Fred came into the picture, at least.    How ruel of me it was, when the poor fellow had done his best, but for this selfish woman, his best was not enough.   Poor Howard ~ I hope he is happy now and has been happy since ~ Marge took him in hand and together they bought a nice bungalow and according to the family they were very comfortable together until she died a pretty ghastly death from cancer.   He has another partner now and I honestly hope he is happy ~ and I'm sorry for the pain and rejection I caused him.  He did not deserve it.   {I don't think Hoard reads this blog, but I feel lighter from having admitted my guilt}

Kate with her family ~ Doug, Dan and Alan ~ and someone in the background that I can't identify !

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Barbara Plum | Reply 15.01.2015 12.42

The lady in the background is reading a list of things she may have just stood in! As for you Joy, broken marriages are Not ONE persons fault! Chuck the Dodos!

Pat Palmer | Reply 14.01.2015 13.45

You are being too hard on yourself ... !

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Latest comments

14.03 | 05:51

Hi Joy, came across your blog while researching the Sanders, thanks for the interesting read about them and your lovely house.

27.10 | 11:43

Michael ~ happily ~ and good luck ~ I'd like to know the outcome ~ joy peach

26.10 | 14:33

I am in the same position. Amazingly, your case R(IS)1/93 - CIS/270/1991 is being used against me. Clearly, it got more complicated. Can I quote your blog? Mike

28.05 | 15:41

Hello Joy. We have a new Merrywood Grammar group on Facebook if you would like to take a look - https://www.facebook.com/groups/509432799238158/

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